tear gas in text form

lol I'm on facebook

2009-01-15T07:10:52Z

I probably will get bored of this and give up on it like I did with myspace, but at the very least it's nowhere near as ugly as that shitty-ass website, so who knows. but yeah, emily made me do it.

here you go, facebookettes-on-LJ: add me, or I will assume you and I are no longer friends and cry a little inside

in other news....no, there is no other news. relationship is awesome. work is awesome. dad is fucked up on pills. the world keeps on a-spinnin'.

there isn't anyone out there

2008-11-23T10:09:27Z

the only person you can trust with your heart is yourself.

or perhaps that's the last person you should ever entrust it to?

can't remember which.

doesn't really matter.

nothing really matters.

blah blah blah

2008-11-10T09:36:52Z

things I have been reading far too much of lately:
-blogs on neo feminism vs. old guard feminism, and how it all somehow came to a head during one drunken "comedy" show in the middle of manhattan

-some bitter Gen Xer who has apparently decided that my (and, probably yours if you're reading this) entire generation sucks because one dipshit ditched work to dress up in a fairy costume.

-lots of libertarian moaning. because that's apparently what we do. we moan. no links come to mind but fuck just go read the comments section of any blog/story on reason. or don't, just read the stories and skip the comments, your sanity will thank you for it. have I mentioned the irrational crush I have on kerry howley dating back to when I saw her on Red Eye like two years ago?

yeah. a fine night to be home from work with nothing to do but read shit on the internetz. actually, no it wasn't, I wanted to play a videogame and instead I got stuck reading/watching shit for like three hours straight instead. fuck off, huffington post, with your ten million links that each have ten million more links.

TOMORROW: rangers-oilers at MSG, bitchez. if they win, well worth the $90. if they lose, I may rob some change from one of Penn Station's many bums in order to make myself feel better.

at least the devils have lost 3 of 4 since 'ol fatty brodeur went down with a 3-4 month injury, lolz. the devils' losses can always bring me joy.

NOT BRINGING ME JOY: having to work the fucking midnight release for the new world of warcraft expansion (and anyone who knows how much I hate WoW, mostly because my brother plays it, will know why this is so annoying), missing the Rangers-Devils game entirely, and then having to OPEN THE MOTHERFUCKING STORE AT 9 AM THE NEXT DAY. UGH. enrique explained it to me in a way that made it sound like that was his only possible way to do the schedule, mostly because out of the six fucking members of management who are supposed to have keys to open/close the store, two of them STILL don't. but still. it fucking. blows.

and speaking of shit at gamestop, apparently I am the most transparent man of all-time when it comes to having a thing for someone else. because mars called out sick today, and enrique basically walks up to the whole bunch of us (me, him, juan, adam, cassidy) and is like, okay, who should I call in for mars? and just as I'm about to say that I don't give a shit as long as it's not joe, juan jumps in with "I BET JOHN WANTS YOU TO CALL LINDA." and of course everyone has a nice hearty belly-laugh at my expense while I immediately start yelling at him about what that could possibly mean. he of course goes, well, I just meant that the two of you WORK WELL together, with that fucking bullshit grin that made it clear exactly what he meant. so I'm just like, she has a boyfriend you know. and being a heterosexual male he just looks at me and goes "so what?" and I know he absolutely meant that because that means NOTHING to these people.

then again maybe he's not so hetero after all because he basically went on to say I was hot. between that and making fun of adam for doing absolutely nothing all day long it kind of made up for the public humiliation of being called out for a schoolgirl crush in front of my fellow co-workers. KIND OF.

cia radio episode 3

2008-10-28T04:14:36Z

is in the books. semp was back alongside myself & quinlan to talk lots of hockey and some wrestling as well. thought it went pretty well, a lot better than week 1 and not as big of a drop-off from week 2 as I was probably expecting with no eddie garcia to carry things again.

but you can right-click here and judge for yourself, if you so desire.

now that the lone bright spot of my week is done, back to four days straight of gamestop. hurray. at least there's no joe and kelly together.....I think so, anyway.

fright fest~~

2008-10-25T07:29:54Z

was awesome, yeah. not the actual like fright fest aspect of it because other than some "spooky" music and a bunch of people in "scary" clown make-up honking their stupid fucking horns it was pretty much the same. but god, front row in kingda ka & nitro was bad-ass enough already, but in the dark and the wind blowing like crazy was even cooler.

not so cool was my glasses breaking in my pocket on the very first ride I went on (kingda ka the first time), so I ended up walking around for the rest of the five hours with a rubber band strapped to half of my glasses. that looked pretty stupid. but hey, better than being blind, and theoretically they should be able to fix it pretty easily at pearl vision tomorrow so no big deal I guess. other than me looking dumber than usual and getting a lot of weird looks, lolz.

and apparently I sound drunk all the time at least over the phone. even when I'm like, completely sober. that's probably an insult.

well, okay

2008-10-21T04:41:47Z

just got done recording episode 2, after a brief scare in which eddie told me to call him to remind him and then I couldn't get a hold of him he just suddenly called in literally a minute before we were supposed to start while I was busy freaking out trying to come up with a back-up plan it went pretty well after that. eddie was just fantastic and I think I did an OK job not sounding too much like a dumbass fanboy. it also helped that the great Mike Sempervive of f4Wonline.com called in like 15 minutes in and stayed on for the rest of the hour, so we definitely didn't have the problem from last week where it was just me talking the entire time (quinlan was on last week and apparently felt he had nothing to add so he just wouldn't talk at all).

if you care to listen you can do so by right-clicking here and going to save link as. next week we may have semp back on and since he obviously knows his wrestling as well as his hockey we may do a special dual show covering both, as quinlan feels he'd have a lot more to add in that case. the fact that people actually listened to my first episode last week and apparently enjoyed it is quite the satisfying feeling, and hopefully I can get similar feedback this week and built off it from there.

YAY INTERNETS~

lol

2008-10-19T23:43:57Z

so remember that stupid little hockey podcast I did last week? yeahhhh, somehow I got Eddie Garcia from PuckPodcast.com to agree to guest co-host my second episode tomorrow at the same time (11 EST! link in one of those entries below! like anyone cares!). now, not only does he have the most popular hockey podcast on the entire internetz, but he also does this whole radio thing professionally for Fox Sports as well. sooooo....to say I am both nervous and intimidated would be perhaps the understatement of the century. even though all the feedback I've gotten from people who've listened to the first episode has been positive.

I'm some kid with a gay voice who's doing this for fun. He's like, 40 and does this professionally. the fuck?

on the upside though, we'll have a lot to talk about. what a weekend it was; like a million shock comebacks and OT upsets. the anaheim ducks are somehow 1-4-0. we could spend the whole hour talking about that if we wanted to (but we won't, because fuck the ducks. lol that rhymed).

GOD I'M GONNA SUCK SO BAD

my first podcast~

2008-10-14T03:48:21Z

Quinlan & I hosted the debut episode of Center Ice Addict thanks to the magic of talkshoe radio (yay free podcasting~), which I figured I might as well post here. right-click here and save link as to download it, it's about a half-hour. ends with me saying we're coming back when we actually don't, lolz, because talkshoe's program doesn't let you pause (how retarded is that?), but yeah, a half-hour is more than enough time for a show like that.

never realized how hard it was to talk for that long, especially when quinlan barely said anything at all (not his fault, he's not that knowledgeable at hockey, can't really blame him), but yeah. it was still a fun experience. quinlan & sean both want to do a wrestling show instead of a hockey one since they would both actually have a lot to say on that one, so perhaps I'll give that a try as well.

lol

2008-10-13T05:47:11Z

Q & A from
Health Canada

Q: The Stanley Cup was recently on tour in my town, and I kissed it. Do I have to worry about being infected by listeria?

A: You are safe. The Stanley Cup has not been in contact with any Maple Leaf product in over 40 years.

in all that drama I almost forgot that les Habs fucking utterly destroyed Toronto 6-1 on saturday. yeah, welcome back to planet earth Leaf Nation. I know, that 3-2 win you eeked out over Detroit when Osgood forgot there was a game was quite the accomplishment, but let's get serious now.

to top off the slaughter of one of my most disliked teams (though I mean, perhaps I shouldn't say that, as they are kind of easy comedic fodder at this point), my favorite hab had 2 goals and an assist, I believe his first-ever 3-point night.

OH SERGEI YOU SO FINEEEEE

tomorrow the Habs will pay Philthy back for that whole second-round elimination in the playoffs, while the Rangers will hopefully not allow the Devils to do the same. though my hopes are not as high for that one, because I mean 5-0 sounds kinda ridiculous. it really hasn't ever happened that often in hockey, because like, 82 games, ya gotta lose some once in a while right? 4-0 is already the Rangers' best start since 1983. yes, as in a quarter-century. the devils don't exactly score goals in bunches though, so if we can get through like a dull 1-1 game and like lost in OT/SO and still pick up at least a point, I'll still be thrilled beyond belief.

not thrilled beyond belief: missing the rangers' following two games (against the sabres & aforementioned maple laffs) as well as the habs' fucking HOME OPENER because of work. bleh.

hockey bullshit part 2

2008-10-10T03:32:21Z

same deal as last time, teams in italics make the playoffs, everyone else sucks. well, not really, this is the west, so some good teams will miss the playoffs. unfortunate side effect of being in the more competitive conference.

Central
1. Detroit Red Wings: god what a no-brainer. last year's Cup team, plus Marian Hossa. the only question mark they have is their goaltending, but Conklin & Osgood both played really well last year so I think they can handle it (even though Osgood looked pretty crappy tonight in their upset loss to the Leafs).

2. Chicago Blackhawks: the most exciting team in the West, with Towes & Kane up front and the free agent signings of Campbell on the backend & Huet in goal. if Havlet isn't finally ready to have an injury-free season they'll struggle a bit before ultimately making it, but if he is they'll coast to a high playoff spot.

3. Nashville Predators: I think their whole ragtag story is inspiring and all that, but with seemingly every other team in the West getting better I just don't see how they make the playoffs for a sixth year in a row (unless other teams majorly underperform due to injuries, which is always possible in this league).

4. Columbus Blue Jackets: they're definitely heading in the right direction, and Hitchcock will have them playing good defensive hockey. but they're the Senators of the West: one good line (that isn't nearly as good as Ottawa's really good line) and absolutely no scoring beyond that. don't see how that's enough to make the playoffs, especially in the ultra-competitive West.

5. St. Louis Blues: they're a draft lottery team. not much else to say about them. if Kariya has a more consistent year up-front they could get on a run but I seriously doubt it's going to happen and the team certainly isn't expecting it to.

Northwest
1. Edmonton Oilers: if the injury bug is finally ready to let up its death-grip on the Oilers, they've got the best shot of any team at winning the most competitive division in all of hockey. either way, they're a playoff team. the young guns will take another step and the power play should be even better with a healthy Souray and Vis-oh god I can't spell his name, the guy they got from the LA trade. this will be a fun, exciting team to watch.

2. Calgary Flames: they'll be there till the end for the Northwest crown, and anytime you've got Jerome Iginla and Dion Phaneuf you're pretty clearly a playoff team. how good they ultimately end up being depends a lot on whether or not Mikka Kippuersoff is finally ready to have another consistently great season in net. and with Mike Keenan behind the bench I don't see that happening. but if he does, they'll take this division.

3. Vancouver Canucks: my upset pick in the West, I think everyone is writing them off WAY too fast. Luongo will have a better season this year and if the defense isn't crippled by injuries again, they'll keep enough pucks out of their own net to make up for their glaringly obvious offensive deficiencies. not enough to win the Northwest, but enough to sneak into the playoffs. of course, if I'm wrong on both those accounts they miss again, but such is life.

4. Minnesota Wild: this is a tough team to pick to miss, because it's a Jacques Lemaire team so you know they will play the trap and get a lot of points from OT and SO losses. but the Marian Gaborik thing will be such a distraction, I don't see how they can make it when they're playing in such a competitive division. it'll be close, but I say they miss this year.

5. Colorado Avalanche: your goalie tandem is Peter Budaj and Andrew Raycroft. 'nuff said.

Pacific
1. Dallas Stars: Brad Richards has an entire season to play in Dallas, Sean Avery will add the intangibles, and it's looking like they'll get Sergei Zubov back from injury MUCH earlier than they did last year. to me, if the Red Wings falter, this is the next big pick to win the entire West and probably the Stanley Cup.

2. Anahiem Ducks: no more distractions with Neidemeyer and Selanne back for the entire year. they're clearly not as good as their Cup-winning team from a couple years back but I don't think they're that far off, and they'll almost certainly get farther than the first round of the playoffs this year (maybe not much farther than the conference semis, though).

3. San Jose Sharks: this is a team that's clearly on the downswing, new coach or no new coach. Joe Thornton will get his regular season points before disappearing in the playoffs yet again, Nabakov will be great again, and Boyle & Blake will improve their blue line. but I don't see how this team is significantly better than the team that faltered last year unless Marleau & Cheechoo are finally ready to get back to where they were a few years back. and I don't think they are.

4. Phoenix Coyotes: the biggest tragedy of the West, the Coyotes are a very good team that will probably still miss the playoffs just because they're in a division with the Big 3 listed above and they're in such a competitive conference in general. still, they've got a shot to make it if Olli gets out of the gate fast for them and Ilya in net can make up for their defensive shortcomings now that Ballard & Boyton have been shipped off to Florida. they'll definitely be there until the end, but if I had to guess I think they just barely miss (before probably making it the following year).

5. Los Angeles Kings: they won't be nearly as bad as some people think they will be, just because this will probably be a breakout year for Anze Kopitar (he showed a lot of signs of it last year) and they've got so much young talent with Dustin Brown & Patrick O'Sullivan up-front and Jack Johnson & Drew Doughty on the backend. but they've still got no goaltending, so I can't see how they make it unless all those aforementioned young talents really come together and just will them into the playoffs.

andddd there you go. enjoying some hockey right now, mostly with teams I don't really care about though (Leafs-Red Wings was earlier with the big upset win for the Leafs, and now it's Bruins-Avs, Canucks-Flames, and Ducks-Sharks as I write this) but tomorrow is when the fun REALLY starts.

lust for life

2008-10-09T09:45:34Z

for once, I have absolutely nothing planned this weekend, and I'm fucking thrilled beyond belief about it. no, seriously. I had four straight days of fucking bullshit work this week, I mean other than wednesday which was pretty easy every other day was actual work at my job. what the fuck? there was the relay on sunday where I was there from 2 pm till 12:30 in the morning doing nothing but moving the entire goddamn store from one side to the other (why? your guess is as good as mine). the rest of the week was kind of cleaning up that mess we made, including tonight, which sucked big-time. but oh well, it's over, I've got three straight days off, and I'm doing NOTHING. AT ALL.

well, tomorrow I will probably hang out with rocel. but that's not going anywhere so who gives a fuck really. and I'm sure there will be like some diddlin' in there somewhere, but that's nothing new.

other than that. I am going to sit in my house, enjoy my gigantic new TV, and HOCKEY IS BACK, MOTHERFUCKERS, WOOOOO~

(I totally freaked adam out leaving work by literally jumping up-and-down with excitement for that lolz. so yes, I'm kinda psyched)

of course there's my adoring 2-0 rangers, with their home opener against the blackhawks (a very exciting team to watch, probably my second-favorite in the west) and then heading to Philthy against the Flyers on saturday. but there's a million other games I'm looking forward to this weekend: ovechkin and the caps opening up the season against the thrashers, my beloved frenchie habs fucking destroying the maple leafs on HOCKEY NIGHT IN CANADA~ on saturday, the oilers (that would be my favorite team in the west for those of you keeping score at home) starting their run to the northwest division crown, anze kopitar and the kings starting what will be a shockingly great season against....uh....whoever the fuck they're playing, and like a billion other games I'm forgetting. point is, IT'S HOCKEY, AND IT'S BACK, FOR REALZ. none of this two games in europe then four days off bullshit. god what gay shit that was.

I'll probably have to open and close on sunday again which is always shitty, but then monday I'm going to versailles (hopefully with sean should he finish kicking his paper's ass, if not by myself like a loser, but oh well) at the knitting factory. so it's not like I'm turning into a total shut-in or anything. but christ, with all the shit I've been doing lately and then this horribly shitty week at work, I'm so looking forward to just doing nothing for a while. no overdramatic overemotional bullshit, no lusting after people I've long since struck out with, and most importantly, NO MORE DIPSHIT CUSTOMERS ASKING IF WE HAVE WII FIT~~~

at least for three days.

versailles is going to rock though. even if other people disagree. fuck, even if their music sucks (which everything I've heard suggests otherwise), they will at least be very very pretty, and it's viskei faggory so that's all that matters right? right. I linked sean to their knitting factory page and he was convinced to go on the prettiness of their outfits alone, so yeah, those are some fucking pretty outfits.

since everyone else on the internetz who are even mildly into hockey does this, these are my divisonal predictions for the season. under an LJ cut since they will be kind of long and most of you don't care, so ya. keep in mind of course I am extremely biased. this will be fun to come back to in april and find out how wrong I was, like pretty much every year.

playoff teams are in italics. every other team sucks.

Atlantic
1. New York Rangers: yes, I'm a homer, but fuck off, this team already showed more chemistry in two games than they showed the entire year last year. they're exactly what renney said they were going to try and be at the end of the season: a fast, puck-moving, aggressive on the forecheck, and still solid defensivley team. so the red wings of the east. if you're gonna copy a team, they're probably a good place to start. don't think they're going all the way to the finals (hi, habs) but they'll at least get back to the ECF, and I'll die of happiness from my two favorite teams fighting it out over who gets to job to the red wings this year.

2. Pittsburgh Penguins: as much as I hate them, they're still a great team even with all the guys they lost up-front. they'd probably still repeat in the Atlantic except for the fact that both Gonchar & Whitney are down with significant injuries, and I don't care if you've got Crosby & Malkin or not, you can't win a division as tight as the Atlantic without your top two defensemen. the games against Ottawa were a preview of what the Pens will be like without them: they'll be playing way more in their own zone. so yeah, still good, not nearly as good, won't repeat as Atlantic champs.

3. New Jersey Devils: I've picked them to miss every year for like a hundred years now and I'm tired of it, so here you go Jersey, I'll pick you to get back into the playoffs yet again. not only because I'm hoping that me picking you to make it means you'll finally miss (oh god is that part of it though), but I mean, it's the same team that made it except they signed Roloston & Holik. so yeah, I dunno, I can't see them missing this year unless Brodeur is FINALLY going to start showing his age.

4. Philadelphia Flyers: I really don't get why everyone is so high on this team. yeah, they had a good run in the playoffs, but they didn't add anyone and they lost the guy who played the biggest part in that playoff run (RJ Umberger) so I don't see how they're suddenly the team to beat in the Atlantic. they're still good, they're still not great, and I think losing the rock-solid Jason Smith on an already depleted backend is going to hurt them a LOT more than people think. I have them sneaking in still, but they aren't going anywhere and I could easily see them missing for Ottawa or Buffalo instead.

5. New York Islanders: they're back to trying to be terrible, and boy will they ever succeed. still, I guess if you're gonna try to be bad, you might as well try to be bad in a year when John Tavares AND Victor Hedman are in the draft. so good years may yet be ahead for the fishsticks. this just ain't gonna be one of them.

Northeast
1. Montreal Canadians: it's the same team that was #1 in the East last year, except they finally got some grit with Laraque, got some veteran depth down the middle with Lang, and added even MORE scoring with Tangauy. oh, I'm sorry, they lost Mark Streit, I'm sure after losing Sheldon Souray did nothing to their power play last year losing a guy who played better on forward than his actual position will fucking CRIPPLE them. right. dumbfucks.

2. Boston Bruins: Kessel will take another step and Bergeron will be back to give some much-needed life to their anemic offense. their defense will be as stingy as ever. they'll make the playoffs again. not much else to say about them.

3. Buffalo Sabres: I could see this team sneaking in if they remember how to play defense and/or Ryan Miller has a better year in net (but he just got a really big extension and traditionally goalies don't play that well after that; hi, Mikka!), but eh. like I said in the philly rant, I wouldn't be shocked if they made it, but I'm not predicting it's gonna happen. they look like the same team that missed last year, and I don't think one more year and a bunch of big fat contract extensions turn them into a playoff team. the only thing I may be underestimating is Craig Rivet, which is why I have them above Ottawa.

4. Ottawa Senators: yeah, they still have one of the best top lines in hockey. but they lost their transition game when Redden went to the Rangers and they rather stupidly traded Mezajorus (or however it's spelled) to Tampa Bay. they'll be tougher to play against with Smith back there, but I can't see how this team makes the playoffs unless the Big 3 just carry them there by sheer force of will. which is still a possibility I guess. but christ, Gerber is awful and Auld will not carry them through an entire season.

5. Toronto Maple Leafs: do I really need to write anything here? they are bad. very bad. probably the worst team in the entire NHL. at least the Thrashers have Kovalchuk. the Leafs have NOTHING on forward. NO ONE. how will these team score goals? like, any at all? Ron Wilson is a great choice for a head coach and they've got a good goalie and a pretty good defense, but the only thing the Leafs will win this year is the Tavares/Hedman sweepstakes.

Southeast
1. Washington Capitals: the biggest no-brainer of these divisonal picks, the Caps will soar with a whole season of Boudreau behind the bench. Ovechkin is Ovechkin, he will score a lot of goals. Mike Green will build upon his breakout rookie season. Nylander will be healthy giving them some depth down the middle. the only question, and I mean the ONLY question, is whether or not Jose Theodore is up to the task of replacing Cristobol Huet in net. he won't be AS good, but he'll do the job.

2. Florida Panthers: yes, this is my upset pick in the east. I think Florida gets in based on the fact that, in my opinion, they have the best defense in the conference. you've got Jay Bowumester playing on a contract year. you've got Bryan McCabe who was never as bad as people made him out to be in Toronto and will have something to prove to them. and you've got Ballard & Boyton from the Jokinen deal. with Voukon as good as he is in net and now some actual defense in front of him, I think the Panthers finally get back to the post-season. but it will be tight and they could easily miss if Horton & Weiss don't step it up and score the way everyone's assumed they'd be able to for a while now.

3. Carolina Hurricanes: yes, this year will make three straight they've missed the playoffs since winning the Cup, mark it down. Cam Ward is proving every year that he was a one-hit wonder in that aforementioned Cup run. they still don't have any defense to speak of, and they've already lost Williams for the season. they'll be okay, they'll contend until the end again, but I can't see them getting in.

4. Tampa Bay Lightning: Melrose behind the bench and Stamkos will be fun to watch, but I don't get all the people saying this is a playoff team. their goaltending will be better but they still don't have much in the way of a blue line, so basically add up all those flashy forwards and you get exactly what you had last year. they'll be better than last place in the entire league, a lot better than that actually in that I think they'll contend for a playoff spot, but no way they make it in this year.

5. Atlanta Thrashers: oh yeah, they're quite bad. Kovalchuck is fantastic but he's got two years left on his deal and I'm betting he's got that date circled on his calendar so he can get the fuck out of Atlanta. their D will be better. but yeah, this is another draft lottery team. and unfortunately for them, Kovalchuck will win them enough games to keep them behind the Isles & Leafs and out of the Tavares/Hedman sweepstakes. so yeah, that basically means they fail at failing. BELIEVE IN BLUELAND~

fuck that took forever, I'll do the west tomorrow.

kicked in the dick

2008-10-06T12:38:16Z

or: I'd totally rather be than have to work till PAST midnight and then open at 9 am the next day. fuck. this. shit.

oh well, while I wait for Itunes to finish updating so I can throw some shit on my Ipod to help get me till 5 pm (yes, not even one of those pussy 9-2 shifts I usually get, a real 9-5 shift on top of it. UGH.) I stole this meme from Larsey. rumors that she has put an e-hit out on me in retaliation may be exaggerated, but hopefully aren't.

ღ I am 5'4 or shorter.
ღ I think I'm ugly. (half the time I do, half the time I think I'm hot. seems to depend on what mirror I'm looking in apparently)
ღ I have many scars.
ღ I tan easily.
ღ I wish my hair was a different color.
ღ I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
ღ I have a tattoo.
ღ I am self-conscious about my appearance.
ღ I have/had braces.
ღ I wear glasses.
ღ I'd get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free, scar-free. (shut up)
ღ I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger.
ღ I have had more than two piercings.
ღ I have had piercings in places besides my ears.
ღ I have freckles.

family/home life
ღ I've sworn at my parents. (my dad, not my mom)
ღ I've run away from home.
ღ I've been kicked out of the house. (sorta?)
ღ My biological parents are together.
ღ I have a sibling less than one year old.
ღ I want to have kids someday.
ღ I have children.
ღ I've lost a child.

embarrassment
ღ I've slipped out a "lol" in a spoken conversation.
ღ Disney movies still make me cry.
ღ I've snorted while laughing.
ღ I've laughed so hard I've cried.
ღ I've glued my hand to something.
ღ I've laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
ღ I've had my trousers rip in public.

health
ღ I've had stitches.
ღ I've broken a bone.
ღ I've had my tonsils removed.
ღ I've sat in a doctor's office with a friend.
ღ I've had my wisdom teeth removed.
ღ I've had serious surgery.
ღ I've had chicken pox.

traveling
ღ I've driven over 200 miles (1000km) in one day.
ღ I've been on a plane.
ღ I've been to North America.
ღ I've been to Niagara Falls.
ღ I've been to Japan.
ღ I've been to Europe.
ღ I've been to Africa.

experiences
ღ I've been lost in my city.
ღ I've seen a shooting star.
ღ I've wished on a shooting star.
ღ I've seen a meteor shower.
ღ I've gone out in public in my pajamas.
ღ I've pushed all the buttons in a lift.
ღ I've been to a casino.
ღ I've been skydiving.
ღ I've gone skinny dipping.
ღ I've played spin the bottle.

random
ღ I can sing well.
ღ I've stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
ღ I open up to others too easily. (used to but to a degree I think I learned my lesson a bit)
ღ I watch the news.
ღ I don't kill bugs.
ღ I hate hearing songs that sacrifice meaning for sake of being able to rhyme.
ღ I fucking swear regularly.
ღ I sing in the shower.
ღ I am a morning person.
ღ I paid for my mobile phone ring tone.
ღ I'm a snob about grammar.
ღ I am a sports fanatic. (only with hockey, that's it)
ღ I play with my hair.
ღ I have/had "x"s in my screen name.
ღ I love being neat.
ღ I love spam.
ღ I've copied more than 30 cds in a day.
ღ I bake well.
ღ My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red or blue.
ღ I don't know how to shoot a gun.
ღ I am in love with love.
ღ I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
ღ I laugh at my own jokes. (only when I'm drunk)
ღ I eat fast food weekly. (I work in a mall, it's pretty much unavoidable)
ღ I believe in ghosts.
ღ I am online 24/7, even as an away message.
ღ I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
ღ I am really ticklish.
ღ I love white chocolate.
ღ I bite my nails.
ღ I play video games.
ღ I'm good at remembering faces.
ღ I'm good at remembering names.
ღ I'm good at remembering dates.
ღ I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life. (I do but I change my mind on it a lot)
ღ My answers are totally honest.
ღ I've crashed a car.
ღ I've been skiing.
ღ I've been in a play.
ღ I've met someone in person from the internet.
ღ I've caught a snowflake on my tongue.
ღ I've seen the northern lights.
ღ I've sat on a roof top at night.
ღ I've played chicken.
ღ I've seen the RHPS.
ღ I've eaten sushi.
ღ I've been snowboarding.

relationships
ღ I'm single.
ღ I'm in a relationship.
ღ I'm available.
ღ I'm engaged.
ღ I'm married.
ღ I've gone on a blind date.
ღ I've been the dumpee more than the dumper.
ღ I have a fear of abandonment.
ღ I've been divorced.
ღ I've had feelings for someone who didn't have them back. (HI EVERYONE)
ღ I've told someone I loved them when I didn't.
ღ I've told someone I didn't love them when I did.
ღ I've kept something from a past relationship.

sexuality
ღ I've had a crush on someone of the same gender.
ღ I've kissed a member of the same gender.
ღ I've had sex with someone of the opposite gender.
ღ I've had sex with someone of the same gender. (blew a couple dudes, no actual like anal though)
ღ I've had sex with more than one person at the same time.
ღ I am a cuddler. (to a degree, just not when I'm actually trying to fall asleep)
ღ I've been kissed in the rain.
ღ I've had sex outdoors.
ღ I've hugged a stranger.
ღ I have kissed a stranger.
ღ I have had sex with a stranger. (one of the dudes I blew? yeahhhhh not one of my finest moments, but I was drunk)

honesty/crime
ღ I've done something I promised someone else I wouldn't.
ღ I have lied to my parents about where I am.
ღ I am keeping a secret from the world.
ღ I've cheated while playing a video game.
ღ I've cheated on a test.
ღ I've driven through a red light.
ღ I've been suspended from school.
ღ I've witnessed a crime.
ღ I've been in a fist fight.
ღ I've been arrested.
ღ I've shoplifted.

drugs/alcohol
ღ I've consumed alcohol.
ღ I have/do smoked cigarettes.
ღ I have/do smoked pot. (one time, didn't get high off it)
ღ I regularly drink. (lately I have been, I guess, but it's a pretty new thing)
ღ I've taken painkillers when I didn't need them.
ღ I take cough medication when I'm not sick.
ღ I've done hard drugs. (YAY COCAINE)
ღ I've been addicted to an illegal substance.
ღ I can't swallow pills.
ღ I can swallow about five pills at a time no problem.

lolz

2008-10-03T09:15:52Z

so yeah, that was another mini-adventure. as being drunk always tends to be. but yeah, basically what happened was I hung out with quinlan & sean today, and after we got back from menlo sean & I randomly just decided to get drunk. kind of annoyed quinlan, but oh well, it was fun. we played smackdown (I somehow went 3-0 despite my increasing level of drunkenness as the matches went on; sean both drank a lot slower and has a much higher tolerance than I), we watched THE NEXUS OF HUMANITY~, and that was about it actually. quinlan was all WA I GOT WORK TOMORROW so when they left I was still, let's say, pretty fucking hammered.

so left drunk and alone, I went on THE INTERNETZ~. all things told actually other than drunkenly messaging some girl on OKC I'm sure I'll just never get a reply to, it could have gone a whole hell of a lot worse. I probably annoyed the hell out of Ally but it's not like that isn't a pretty routine occurrence. Kyle was <3, and I reconnected with Anna who I had kind of like been too much of a pussy to IM since she got back to Pittsburgh. but I was DRUNK tonight you see, so there you go. also talked to lauren for a lil' bit, god do I luv that grrl. what a long wait that's gonna be.

so point is: thanks for keeping my drunk ass company guyz. I appreciate it, and sorry if I was really goddamn annoying. I will attempt not to do that again anytime soon.

oh and for the none of you who are waiting for another ten-page entry on sunday to match the one about saturday, well, yeah, I don't expect that one to be coming anytime soon. most of you were like there at some point anyway, but the basic recap is: went to karaoke and got drunk (told you I'm a lush now, this is a very recent development but fuck it getting drunk is more fun than being sober), sang some amazing songs (some of which were actually picked by quinlan for once, gasp), drunkenly stumbled through some subway stations and almost got lost twice, sobered up at THE SURF BAR~ in the middle of hipstervile, brooklyn, and then went to the fucking greatest concert of my life, ZAZEN BOYS~~~

going to see them again saturday night in hoboken, looking like with ally, quinlan, sean, and maybe ethan. we'll miss kyle a lot I'm sure, though it's probably a blessing in disguise because judging how the last two times I've had Kyle around my friends have gone, I fully expect if she was there for Ethan to get down on one knee and like propose to her or something.

oh you guyz~

liek what

2008-10-03T03:36:48Z

i'm worried that i'm offically turning into a lush

i got drunk with sean tonight that was fun. quinlan was bitching cause he couldn't drink cause he had to drive. so he's better than my brother. who like, drinks and smokes pot and drives lolz. and he called me at random while I was drunk wtf. he never calls me. it's like he's psychic

i dunno why i'm drunk posting on my lj. prolly cause I'm a fag. and no one likes me.

WOOOOOO~

2008-09-30T09:17:52Z

so, the greatest weekend of all-time. yeah. let's RECAP~

unfortunately without pictures because my Iphone broke like a week ago. I wanted to like kill someone when that happened, would have loved some pictures of Zazen Boys looking all hot and sexy, but then again I was so into the fucking amazing, mind-blowing music they were playing I might have forgotten anyway.

we actually start off on friday but not much happened then. played some ITG2 at menlo, kicked ass (do I do anything else?), hung out with THE REGULARS~ that Quinlan can't stand for some reason. then went to Ethan's, hung out with him & Swo, played four-player Resistance, showed them the weirdness and awesome that is Gitaroo Man, and that's about it. it was pretty fun, but nothing compared to the weekend that was TO COME~

after my usual no-sleep I had to wake up at like 10:30 to go pick up Sean in East Brunswick, so that sucked a lil' bit (but not nearly as much as going to a hockey game by yourself like some kind of leper). then again Sean is entertaining so the ride back was kinda fun. caught a train at like quarter to noon, and somehow we randomly just run into Ethan catching the same train (he was going to NYC for the anigay con, which I did NOT go to! whee!). that was kind of funny in and of itself because Ethan had claimed the night before he would be leaving earlier; the fact that he did not hardly surprised me. but hey, more company for the train ride is always cool. then Sean & I made that oh-so-long walk (up a flight of stairs) from Penn Station to MSG for the Rangers and the Devils in the Rangers' last pre-season game before heading over to Europe (they'll play two more exhibitions, against a Swedish team and a Russian team, before the official start of the season against the Lightning in Prague on Saturday & Sunday).

now, this certainly started off as the only negative of the day, because as I read someone else say on a blog, the Rangers' at least started off mentally already on their 7 pm flight. they were AWFUL in the first period, and I mean AWFUL. they turned the puck over in their own zone, their forwards couldn't get any offensive pressure at all, and Henrik let in two soft goals (one he had no chance on) to go down 3-0 at the end of the 1st. fortunately, this game doesn't count, so I was still able to enjoy myself as the Rangers came back and played MUCH better in the 2nd & the 3rd. Zheredev finally looked like the guy they traded for with an amazingly pretty goal so that was certainly great to see, and the final score ended up 4-2 Devils. Sean, who likes hockey but doesn't follow it nearly as closely as me, provided some hilarious analysis of the game when he was all "at least the Rangers' goals were fun to watch. the Devils' goals were just all of their players standing in front of the net masturbating with their sticks." I lol'ed. for a law school student the dude can be funny.

so after that we went over to dave & buster's at times square, ate some food that actually wasn't terrible, then I played some Supernova 2. okay more like a lot of SN2. but I had to wait there for Ethan to come from the anigay con and meet up with me anyway, and then I had to wait for Ethan to (very slowly) eat his steak, so it's not like I was holding anyone else up with it. for once. anyway, unlike every other time I've gone there where they were one or two other good people along with the usual noob collection, this time it was just me & the noobs, so that meant I got rather large crowds (this peaked when I did PSMO- if you've ever seen Paranoia Survivor MAX on ONI I'm sure you'd know why) and I got to play a whole hell of a lot since apparently I intimidated most of the people there too much to actually come up and do their little beginner routine. eventually a few did but for the most part it was me playing game after game which is fine by me. anyway, after that we said our goodbyes to Sean and Ethan & I headed out for the KNITTING FACTORY~ and the saturday night concert.

now, this is why I was so happy to not have to attend the anigay con for once; though this concert, the Far East to East Showcase, was sponsored by the anime convention and they listed it as an "event" on their website, in actuality it was completely separate from it. in another words, you had to buy a ticket to get in (for the very modest price of $18) and it didn't matter whether or not you had a con badge. so after taking a little bit to find it we got there like 15 minutes after doors had opened at 6:30, bought our tickets, and went inside. what a fucking great venue that place is. I had certainly heard of it before, but I had never actually been to a concert there, and I was kinda blown away by how great it was. it's one of those places that is like a tiny little stage (and it was the main stage of the place, but yeah it was quite tiny), relatively large floor (though there couldn't have been anymore than 100-150 people in there even at the various peaks. maybe a little more for Notorious MSG actually lolz), and then a bar off to the side. it's just the fucking perfect set-up.

so ethan & I end up right at the front of the stage, off to the right side a little bit but generally right where the guitarist was all night. I am reminded that indie concerts (and especially indie concerts with a long lineup) are a lot like indy wrestling shows as far as the scheduled start time being more like a very vague suggestion, because we ended up kinda just standing there till about 8:15 when it finally started. in the meantime I got drunk off the aforementioned sex on the beach (it took like two of them, so yeah, my alochol tolerance is apparently very very low) and bonded with the people standing next to us, a short but very pretty girl named Alexis and her slightly hotter, half-gay, and as I'd later find out half-black dude-who-I-thought-was-her-boyfriend-but-actually-wasn't. and I cannot remember his name though I'm sure he told me it; the only reason why I remember Alexis' name is because she gave me her cell number and thus I have it on there. but either way, fun times. somewhere between then and the concert actually starting I had a third drink, and walking was becoming increasingly entertaining.

so the Far East to East Showcase basically had a whole lot of bands, some of whom were actually Japanese, some of whom weren't. the opener was actually the band I came to see, Falsies on Heat, in that I had actually heard of them and heard their stuff before and liked it quite a bit. they were pretty much exactly what I was expecting them to be live; very loud and very punk. it's three girls (one on vocals/guitar, one on guitar, one on bass) and a male drummer, so the japanese girl fetish portion of the audience (i.e. most of the dudes who came from the anigay con) were quite happy, though nowhere near as happy as they would be later. Ethan & I spent a lot of time debating over whether or not the lead singer was actually hot; I said she was hot in a scary way (she did some....interesting things, like touch herself over and over again to the point where it was almost masturbation, jump on top of the amps and do the same, and make out with Alexis at the front of the stage), and he just said she was scary. we both agreed on the bassist who was not just a hottie but also a bad-ass. basically, she just kept her back turned to the audience the ENTIRE time with the most stoic look on her face you ever saw, and then she'd turn around only to screech something into the microphone (she was the screamer of the group, forsho) and immediately turn back around again. anyway, they were pretty goddamn great.

second band out was MiniRex, a band I had never heard of. they're also from Seattle so the first not-actual-Japanese band of this here Japanese musical showcase, though I do think they had some random Japanese lyrics in a couple of their songs so it was still more of a tie-in than Notorious MSG was (more on them later). they were more peppy than the last band, but I still ended up liking them a lot. they did the usual American indie thing where their first song sucked ass and sounded nothing like the rest of their music, but they were really catchy & fun so I liked them (though not quite as much as Falsies just because they had a lot more stage presence). "snow day" and "stalker" were their strongest songs, very catchy in that usual lo-fi indie guitar pop way. also their look was kind of interesting in that they all wore matching red-and-white jumpsuits with letters spelling out MiniRex on them (the drummer wore "Rex", the others all each got a letter). anyway, this is interesting only because these shirts had no pants, and the bassist felt she had to do the same thing even though she was just MASSIVELY overweight. thankfully she was on the other side of the stage so other than out of the corner of my eye I never had to see too much of that shit.

next up was my favorite of the night, QUAFF~. I don't really know how to describe these guys except to say that they were fucking GREAT. the best way I can think of is vis-kei meets stadium rock. they had an incredibly hot hide lookalike with giant red hair as one of the guitarists and an almost-as-hot blonde dude as the other one. the bassist was also quite attractive, and the lead singer was too with his black hair that looked vaguely porcupine-ish. other than the lead singer they also had another guy in a red-and-black mask who is listed on their myspace (yes, even Japanese bands have that shit now, ugh) as just being "mic". not vocals, mind you, but "mic". and yes, he was awesome. their actual music rocked plenty hard enough, but the peak of their performance (and the entire night really) was when the mic dude started holding up sides explaining how they came from heaven and thus knew every song that ever existed. he then went on to explain that he just came up with a new song he thought we would love, and then went up to each member of the band (who did this fantastic over-acting job of pretending they were playing this song of his for the first time) and made a noise to show them how he wanted them to play. like he'd go "badum-bum" to the drummer, for instance. first the drummer, then the bassist, then finally the guitarists played this tiny beat, and then all of sudden it turned into...."beat it" by michael jackson. yes, it was the greatest thing ever. the ENTIRE fucking crowd went nuts and sang the entire song along and goddamn if it wasn't the best cover of a michael jackson song by a Japanese viskei/stadium rock band I'd ever heard in my life. so yeah, Quaff fucking rocked.

then came Echostream, another English band (this time from NYC I believe). they took by far the longest to set-up due to needing a drum kit AND a drum machine hooked up to a macbook, along with two pianos and the guitarist. I thought they were kind of the weakest band of the lineup, in that they were good for a change of pace from the rest of the bands but nothing they played really stood out to me. it was like, okay, I get what you're going for (electronic ambience meets some mild rock n' roll) but I've heard this done so much better by so many better bands and they didn't really seem to have much to say lyrically either. they probably were 3rd on the night when it came to having people who showed up just for them and then left, which I guess makes sense considering they're based in the city and must have amassed something resembling a fan following by now.

after Echostream was....well....the Notorious MSG. this is quite easily the hardest of all of these bands to describe, because they're....the Notorious MSG. now, when I said Echostream was 3rd as far as having the most people who showed up just for them, it wasn't a close race by any means. the Notorious MSG won it VERY easily. now, earlier I had been a nice criminal and bought some booze (alexis & her not-boyfriend also wanted some sex on the beach, if you get what i'm sayin') so he was nice enough to pay for a fourth drink for me. this lead to this drunk asian chick and I having an interesting exchange where she was like "you're sure drinking that fast.", I was like "well I got it for free." and she was all "I got TWO free drinks hah~!". not two seconds after she said that, she dropped her drink (and splashed some onto Ethan's legs apparently). not missing a beat I deadpanned and said "looks like you've got one free drink now." and she simply stumbled off, never to be seen again. oh, and the earlier buying-me-a-drink lead to how I found out the dude was half-black, as when I couldn't hear a word he said he apparently just thought I was misunderstanding him and said "dude come on I'm not that black you should be able to understand me." awesome. later when Alexis had stumbled off after getting hit on by like the fifth band member of the night I asked him if this was making him jealous and he said no since they're not dating anyway. when I asked why he paused for a moment and then was just like "...I don't know. ask her." and immediately I both understood how their relationship worked and felt quite bad for him. and he was actually hotter than her so I don't get it, but hey, whatevs.

ANYWAY. I realize all that had nothing to do with Notorious MSG but oh well, I thought it was funny. it also delays me having to explain Notorious MSG because it's going to be fucking hard. okay, so, first comes out a Japanese dude in very tight white-and-black clothing (with dazy dukes no less). he encourages us to slap his ass which the three of us who like dudes do, and then out comes this white dude with a beard who looks like....I don't know. a parody of a biker? he also has a GUITAR that's shaped like a GUN. so they play for a while and I'm like...okay...I guess they're warming up. this intro goes on for a while, until finally out come running from the back.....three asian dudes (one of their groupies later explained to me it was "two chinese, one korean" like this was vital knowledge or something) in military outfits, all with mics, all rapping. apparently as they explained they were three chinatown chefs ("chinatown 4 life!" as they yelled at random) who did this for fun. they were also incredibly buff, like we're talking bigger guns than 3/4s of the ROH roster here, which only added to the whole....experience. anyway, they rapped about "eggrollin'" and how they had a black belt in tapping ass (after a rather hilarious interlude where one of them complained about how it's bullshit that white people always think they know kung-fu....then paused and just said "but it's true, we do know kung-fu.") and all kinds of other shit. they also gave out roses to random female members of the audience and complained about how they hated "Japanese dudes in tight clothing" talking about their drummer-slash-prisoner. so yeah, that was by far the most interesting and weird thing of the night. for the most part I liked them for what they were, but I thought they dragged a bit at the end. could have done without the last two songs. but oh well, the crowd really loved them.

afterwards at least half the crowd who had came specifically for them left, but more started filing in so it didn't look nearly as empty as it seemed like it would be at first. the second-to-last band that went on would turn out to be the last one we would see, as we had to bail right in the middle of it in time to catch the last NJTransit train at 1:41 am (they had started quite a bit late, if you don't recall since this fucking entry is about ten billion years long). anyway, it was TsuShiMaMiRe (and you bet your ass I just copy-and-pasted their name), the only other band I had actually listened to prior to the concert. they were basically another all-girl punk group, this time just a trio (guitarist/vocals, bassist, drummer). the lead singer was like the girliest, shyest stereotypical Asian chick you'd ever seen in your life (she was literally stumbling over her words in-between random nervous giggles whenever she'd talk), which explains why so much of the anifag crowd was there specifically to see them. one guy in particular who was also there last night kind of had the wackiest, most off-beat dance I'd ever seen in my life that he only did for them (rest of the night he had just kind of stood there). but yeah, they were very good. point in talking about her being like that is then when they'd actually start playing, she would somehow transform her voice into doing like some of the most hardcore screeching you'd ever hear in your life. she'd also sing happy and peppy in some of the songs too, so point is she had fucking incredible vocal range. we only got to listen to four or five of their songs, which is unfortunate because they were quite great. probably my second-favorite of the night after Quaff.

anyway, we ended up having to leave before the last band, Bakubeni, came out to play, but that ended up being no big deal because they played on Sunday night anyway. and I am officially splitting this whole weekend journal entry recap thing into two entries now, because my fucking fingers are starting to hurt from all this typing. yeah, point is, saturday night rocked very, very hard, and I was quite surprised at how much fun Ethan was to attend a concert with. the bands he got into (Quaff and later TsuShiMaMiRe) he got really into and if you know Ethan you probably wouldn't expect him to start rockin' out as hard as he did. also met a couple of very cool people (and this reminds me I need to get the dude's phone number from Alexis at some point) which is always fun as well. it was a great start, but sunday would top it. and I will talk about that....some other time. I'll try to keep it shorter than this was (if you actually read all this, christ I apologize), but no promises lololol

this weekend~!

2008-09-24T07:34:47Z

forgetting the usual emo bullshit for a second, this weekend is going to fucking RULE.

saturday: rangers-devils preseason game @ msg with sean, then meeting up with ethan (who is at the anigay con that's going on in nyc at the same time, which I am not going to lolz) for that whole "eating" thing, then random japanese punk concert (they call it "far east to east showcase" or some such bullshit- lineup is here) @ knitting factory

sunday: possibly book off, then karaoke w/ ally/kyle/sean/ethan/quinlan, then ZAZEN BOYS~~ @ whatever shitty place in brooklyn they're playing with all of the above who are actually cool enough to go

no idea how I packed that much shit into two days, and I may in fact not be alive by the time all this shit is over. which would be a-ok by me.

lol life

2008-09-20T18:28:20Z

I really, really wish people would stop asking me how my mom is doing. especially family members on my dad's side who, up until now, never shut the fuck up about what a bitch she supposedly was. now she has cancer so apparently they've all turned into concerned citizens. right. fucking asshats.

but in general I just have no idea how she is doing. she doesn't tell me that sort of thing; she lies about it instead. I know that up until like the day she dies she'll never admit that a single thing is wrong with her, so even if this chemo is going great or it's going shitty I won't be able to tell the goddamn difference. awesome.

so, what else has been going on? got stood up last night. girl stalks me in menlo forever, finally gets up the nerve to ask me for my number, asks me out, then stands me up. what the fuck?

my iphone broke. ordered a 16gb touch to replace it so I don't have to deal with this fucking headphone converter bullshit again (that's what broke, a piece of it got stuck in there and though quinlan's dad managed to get it out it still had damaged the headphone jack beyond repair). still gonna miss all the hacked apps, but eh. as long as it is shiny, goes on the web, and plays music, I'll probably be okay. don't know if it has a camera or not though, pretty sure it doesn't, and I loved the camera on my iphone. ohs wellz.

car stalled out on me last weekend at work, but it turned out to be a false alarm. still, now I'm paranoid everytime I go to turn it on.

pretty much I have been getting my ass kicked by life in every single way of late. sometimes, nay, a lot of the time, I think about why I even bother. and by that I mean, bother being alive.

got tired of shaving

2008-08-28T12:00:16Z

there's other things to cut anyway amirite?

distractions

2008-08-21T08:15:09Z

i'm probably going to go see my mom first weekend of september. my dad is nice enough to fly me down there, so i'm going to take him up on his offer and go see her before she has to go in for chemo. which is good, both because i can offer moral support while she's probably worried about how that will go and because i don't really want to see her like that. so yeah. not much more to say on that front, the random bouts of crying and the like probably aren't going to go away anytime soon. best i can do is keep myself distracted, which i've been doing an okay job of.

so, distractions. having the fox soccer channel now means i can follow english premier league football, which is a fun diversion till hockey gets going. i mean i know there's always the american kind, which i'm okay with in that i can actually watch it without being bored out of my mind like i would be with baseball or basketball, but i don't give enough of a fuck about it to watch pre-season shit and by the time the nfl actually gets going, hockey is in training camp and then pre-season starts and i don't care. i'll probably lose interest in the premier league around that time too, but for now it's a fun diversion. chelsea is my team simply because being a manchester united fan is such a raging cliche by this point, and they certainly started well this weekend with a fucking 4-0 thrashing of portsmouth, so hurray for that i guess. i'm in this mostly for the english accents (which are, let's face it, fucking sexy as hell) and listening to them dissect everything on super sunday + is a bit of a highlight.

speaking of hockey, i really wish this whole sundin saga would fucking be over already. i love the guy but jesus, the new news that this might go on till sept. 15th when the NHLPA extends the bargaining agreement and allows teams to once again divert some of the veteran contracts makes me want to fucking vomit. the news that he wants to play for my rangers is great, but the news that it might cost us roszival has me iffy on the whole thing just because i still am not sold on wade redden turning his career around in new york and at least with roszival there it wouldn't be a complete disaster if he plays like he's been playing in ottawa the past couple of seasons. without roszival there our defense suddenly looks iffy, and i'm not so sure having sundin is worth it. i'd be fine with him going to the habs instead since they're my second-favorite team and they have so much more cap room than we do, but really i just want it to be over already so i can start looking ahead to training camp without wondering what the fuck my teams are going to actually look like.

with all that said, i really, really cannot wait to make everyone writing the rangers off already (yes, here in august) choke on their fucking words. i seem to remember a year right after the lockout where we were projected to finish worst in the east and instead made the playoffs, so all the "oh, the rangers have downgraded, they're fucked without jagr, etc." douchebags can pretty much blow me. unless every single move sather made backfires (and I think there's a good chance SOME of them will, but if you don't think gomez can turn zheredev into at least a 40-goal scorer, if not 50, you're out of your mind. look at patrick elias before and after gomez left new jersey you dipshits), this is still a playoff team. no one in the east who missed last year made significant enough moves to make it other than perhaps tampa bay and MAYBE florida if voukon plays like he did last year and their defense is as good as it looks on paper, and i still think ottawa is pretty much a lock to miss. we'll see i guess. in any rate there's still my habs and my caps, and if you don't think those two teams are winning their divisions i'm sure my brother would like some of whatever the hell you're smoking.

other than that, uh. pretty dull week. opening and closing at gamestop, playing some itg2, etc. saw pineapple express, it was funny as hell and definitely worth going out of your way to see, and this is coming from someone who hates going to the movies. and that's about it really.

doctors can blow me

2008-08-19T03:02:58Z

so yeah, remember the whole part where they took a sample out and it was benign and she's gonna be fine and blah blah motherfucking blah? all bullshit. now they're saying it's NOT benign, it's spread, and she needs to start chemotherapy in about a month.

so okay, officially back to panicking now.

junk and stuff

2008-08-11T23:00:42Z

the tumor's benign. so i guess i should be like, relieved. and i am, to a degree. but i'll feel better about it once they actually, you know, take it out of her. everytime i talk to her or my brother they keep moving the date back because they're waiting for her to "get stronger", so yeah. that makes me nervous. but i'm cautiously optimistic at this point she's gonna be okay. random crying has stopped for the most part.

so, off of that depressing shit. otakon was pretty much the fucking greatest thing ever. i'll write like a more detailed entry on that when i'm not like completely wiped out (got literally like 4 hours of sleep in the past four days, then i had to go in immediately this morning at 8:15 am to learn how to open at gamestop and was there till 5, so yeah. probably gonna go collapse in a sec). the short version is, there were seemingly a million awesome j-rock panels, i discovered about thirty great new bands to listen to (my computer has been pretty much downloading discography torrents nonstop since i got home) and i was like three inches from the stage for the underneath's concert, which obviously fucking ruled. that's a weekend that probably won't be topped for quite a while.

and for all the "why the fuck do you go to otakon if you don't even like anime" types, well, i pretty much avoided anime entirely for the entire weekend. there's so much non-anime related shit to do there now, it's not like animenext where i was constantly having to remind myself why i was actually there. it was just fucking great on so many different levels. anime can still pretty much blow me but otakon, on the other hand, will be on the receiving end of many verbal bjs for quite a long time to come.

my mom is sick and in the hospital

2008-07-30T07:09:34Z

she's having some kind of emergency colon surgery tomorrow. and this isn't like my dad where he's pretty much having some "emergency surgery" every other week, she's never really had any health problems before, real or imagined. so to say I'm freaked out would kind of be an understatement. especially since unlike with my dad saying that I love my mother doesn't come with some huge asterisk. she's just an amazing woman who had the misfortune of marrying two different assholes. I don't even know what I'm rambling on about now, but the point is she and my grandmother (on her side) are like the two members of my immediate family who are actually sane and not on drugs. and now one of them's in the hospital and it fucking sucks.

whenever people I love tell me over and over again that "everything is going to be fine" while meanwhile they're lying in a hospital bed in immense amounts of pain I tend to want to fucking shoot someone.

and on it goes

2008-06-30T07:51:52Z

So, Gamestop. What a fucking weekend that was. Had me scheduled four days in a row (and yeah, for those of you with FULL-time jobs I'm sure you won't appreciate my bitching, but usually I get like, at most, two in a row) from Wednesday through Saturday, but oddly enough Saturday was the least busy of the four. Apparently everyone suddenly developed lives, what a remarkable thing. Saturday was one of those days I had, to be quite frank, the easiest job in the entire world; I basically stood behind the counter for five-and-a-half hours and talked hockey with Bart (who, despite his handicap of having a ridiculous name AND his additional handicap of being a Devils fan, is a pretty goddamn cool guy). I'm sure there were a customer or two in there somewhere and the tiniest bit of marketing, but other than that.

Having worked there for a while now I finally got that lovely privilege eventually given to all Gamestop employees called "checking out games". What that basically means is any used game in the store, for any system, can be taken out for free for four days at a time. Only catch is we have to have at least two copies of the game (or well technically the store manager can say "DON'T TAKE OUT THIS GAME~" even if we do have at least two copies of it, but I've yet to see that happen since I started working there so I'm guessing it's another one of those rules everyone ignores. gotta love those). So I promptly checked out the US version of beatmania moreso out of morbid curiosity than anything else (and due to the fact that we only had one copy of Gitaroo Man, meaning I'll have to buy that. fuck you texas, I'm pretty sure I lost my copy of it there). And well other than the US ranking being down I'm having quite a bit of fun getting back in touch with my beat-scratching skillz. Okay, actually I still suck but hey, I AAA'ed a couple of 4s and AA'ed a bunch of 5s so I could be worse. I'm sure I'll be passing 7s and 8s any day now. Uh-huh, rite.

But anyway, back on Gamestop for a sec, it seems I'm about to be getting PROMOTED~. Or at least so I'm told. More money is always a good thing whether or not I necessarily have any burning use for it, and hopefully my hours will go up on a more consistent basis as well. Like last week I had almost 20, this week I end up with 12. Week before last I had 9. So uh, yeah. Fucking weird man.

As far as weekends go this one didn't suck. JAPW on Saturday night was actually a bad-ass show, including seeing the dude in my avatar live for the first time in years (and the first time ever in EVIL BLACK TRUNKS~). Oh god it was so great, he's just as great (and umm hawt lolz) as ever. Christian Cage vs. Jimmy Rave was another really fun match, and then there's Kenny Omega....oh god, if you guys- and by guys I mean guys interested in the wrasslin' crap- haven't seen him yet, go out of your way to, he's the greatest thing ever. Comes out to a wacky techno song, uses sailor moon poses and a fucking hadouken attack, and just goes out of his way to be as gay and wacky as possible. It draws the fucking most amazing heat ever, where half the crowd (this would include Quinlan & I) are absolutely in love with him and the other half want to see him die as painfully as humanly possible. So yeah, he's great and he's their champion now. Then of all people Dan Maff returned at the end, teased going after Omega, then of course swerved and helped him lay everyone out instead. Probably the best non-ROH indy show I've been to in years, and was probably even better than ROH's Hammerstein show (not quite as good as the Philly PPV taping, though).

Then today hung out with Quinlan some more, played the gayness at Menlo and then watched Night of Champions which was also pretty goddamn great. Cena vs. Hunter effin' ruled and I got to spaz out and celebrate when HHH somehow managed to retain (of course Quinlan was cheering for Cena and of course I made sure to have the most overdramatic, long celebration as possible). Probably the best WWE PPV in a long, long time too.

Now back to having not much of anything to do, not this weekend at least, but oh well, I'm sure something will come up. Something always does.

And hey speaking of stuff to do, this is pretty much my schedule for the summer as it's shaping up right now. Mostly this is here for my own benefit because I keep forgetting when shit is (and uh I have to remember to ask off for all this shit), not necessarily to brag about what an exciting, richful life I live (lolz). But yeah. Right now it's shaping up like:

7/13: ITG2 sight-read tourney @ Menlo, then Enrique's "who's the thief?!" mystery gamestop dinner thing @ uhh champs i think (probably gonna have to go home and shower in-between)
7/20: Great American Bash @ Nassau Coliseum, which Quinlan & I somehow scored FLOOR SEATS~ to. fuck yaaaa. I seriously had no idea this PPV was two weeks from Sunday until I started doing this and looked it up, lololol. Guess that increases the chances of actually seeing CM Punk defend the Heavyweight Championship of the Planet Earth at this show. Though I guess there's still two more RAWs they could have him lose it on, in which case I will be sure to post another LJ entry bitching about it. And possibly do some cuttin'
8/2: ROH at Hammerstein with MCMG vs. Steenerico~
8/7-8/10: Otakon where I can attend the JAM Project concert and sneer at all the nerds around me getting excited because they're playing one of the fucking DBZ openings. Seriously now.
8/17: TNA "whatever stupid PPV name this is called" @ Sovereign Bank Arena. Right now I'm more psyched for this because apparently ICE-T IS PERFORMING~. Don't ask me why he's performing for a C-list shitty excuse for a national wrestling company (sorry Sean), but fuck yeahhhh.

fuck dating

2008-06-26T03:54:24Z

I should have already figured this out by now, cause like hello I'm 22 and I've been in seemingly a billion relationships, but basically, the way it works is:

-if you like someone, they either won't like you or, even worse, they'll like you but still be unavailable for a variety of reasons (location, crazy phobias, dating someone else, etc.)

-if you don't like someone, they'll be fucking OBSESSED with you and stalk you where you work.

-if you give someone who you have yet to really form an opinion on a chance and go out with them, you'll probably have a shitty time and not want to go out with them again. of course, they'll feel just the opposite and start calling you everyday/sending you a million text messages, and you'll be placed in the incredibly awkward position of trying to come up with a new excuse for why you can't go out with them again everytime they ask. because apparently people just don't take a fucking hint anymore. i mean, fourth day in a row where person x has an incredibly stupid excuse, i think i would figure it out, but nope.

So I've pretty much been going through all three scenarios lately. Yes, AT THE SAME FUCKING TIME. While I'm annoying the piss out of my friends by bitching about this someone almost always asks me "John, why the fuck do you even bother? I mean you don't even really like sex, so what the fuck." I never really have an answer, either, so apparently I just have some kind of brain defect that makes me push on despite having no real reason to. Lovely. And people wonder why I smoke and drive too fast.

Off the emo drama bullshit, this past weekend was an anime con, which inexplicably I attended despite having last watched any anime like three years ago (well, other than Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged, but Ethan says that doesn't count). Oh well, my friends were going, I ran into even more people I knew there, and I had fun despite myself. The concert was pretty goddamn great even though I had no idea who the band was going in (RENTRER EN SOI for the three of you who might care), and the rave on Saturday was pretty much a blast too even though the first DJ was so-so at best and the second one sucked real bad. I'm probably going to Otakon for the first time in like four years again for no better reason than "because all my friends are going" and "there's a rave on both days so I can once again make a complete idiot out of myself with my utter lack of dance ability". Of course the upside of an anime con rave as compared to a normal rave or dance club is that aforementioned complete lack of dancing ability blends in a hell of a lot better.

But yes, I'm kind of annoyed at myself in general right now. So if I sound even more whiny and obnoxious than usual lately, well, I apologize. I'm sure I'll be over it at some point. Eventually. Probably. Maybe. Oh, who the fuck am I kidding.

shit i've been listening to lately

2008-06-18T05:08:22Z

Yeah, so, I've been in a very post-punk/discopunk (and yes, those are two really fucking stupid sub-genre names, but then again most sub-genre names are fucking dumb-sounding. at least it's not "electroclash" or, god forbid, "post-hardcore") mood as of late, which I guess comes with the whole reclusive territory. So I felt like I'd better jump onto the "hay guyz here's what I've been listening to lately, as if you could possibly care" bandwagon that was so popular here on LJ, like, five years ago. You could call me fashionably late, but that would imply that I was fashionable.

Anyway, first thing I listened to was Gang of Four's full-length debut record, Entertainment!. I hadn't listened to the entire thing all the way through in like four years, and god, what a fucking revelation that was. This record came out in the fall of 1979, but listen to it now and it really does sound like it could have come out 2-5 years ago, tops. Of course that's partially because "ripping off Gang of Four" sort of became its own sub-genre this decade, but jesus, few records can stand up to the test of time like this one can. It's just as relevant as the day it first arrived, something that you can't really say for their later records (though I do remember their follow-up, Gold, being almost as good and that's on my list to listen to again at some point; it was their much later work where they really sank deep down into the minor-club-hit doldrums that, if listened to now, would probably sound kind of like a British guy singing a slightly tinnier version of "I'm Too Sexy". and yes, I know the guy who sang that was British). "Guns Before Butter" is one of those songs that you will be forced into moving some part of your body to, lest you be in a coma. "I Found That Essence Rare" is the greatest song comparing a girl's fashion sense to an h-bomb ever written, and just one listen of "At Home He's a Tourist" is pretty much guarenteed to get it stuck in your head for several years, minimum. If you've never heard this record you pretty much owe it to yourself to give it a listen; then again, if you've listened to modern rock radio at all this decade you'll probably feel like you've heard it before anyway.

Afterwards I decided to listen to The Velvet Underground's entire discography (well, the four studio albums, some random demos/b-sides/live performances from Peel Slowly & See, VU, and Another View; didn't bother with all the live-only albums because I was already listening to 95 songs here). Not technically post-punk I'm well aware given that it came about a decade earlier, but like every other genre of rock it wouldn't have been possible without the Velvets anyway so I suppose it's still vaguely related. Anyway, listening it to it all in order really just reaffirmed my love for John Cale; yeah, everyone knows Lou Reed has amazing vocals and his lyrical abilities are pretty much second-to-none, but Cale gets kind of the short end of the stick from a lot of fans. Their music just lost a lot without Cale's viola there in the background; to be quite honest, the first post-Cale album, 1969's self-titled album, really came off like my least favorite of the four, and from what I gather it seems to be most people's favorite. But the first two records really have all the standout songs on them for me; "Venus in Furs" (though I actually like the 15-minute demo from Peel Slowly better than the album version; it's the only demo I really like from that disc, in fact), the fucking amazing "Heroin", "All Tomorrow's Parties" which benefits greatly from Nico's delivery, and to a lesser extent "I'm Waiting for the Man" off the first album are all fucking amazing. The second album has a few less, but still the title "White Light/White Heat" track that practically ended up being the punk rock blueprint, "Sister Ray" even for its relative excesses, and "Here She Comes Now" are all equally great. And "The Gift", though not a song really, is still incredibly entertaining. There really isn't anything off their third album I like to any similar degree. I should mention though I haven't listened to the so-called "Reed closet version" that's on Peel Slowly & See; some people say that's the only one worth listening to, so eventually I'll get around to that and maybe I'll like it better. As for Loaded, well, I liked it a little more than their third record, but I still think their first two were a lot better. "Sweet Jane" and "New Age" were better than anything on the third record, at least to me, but I can see why a lot of people write this record off because it sounds absolutely nothing like their first three (even given the Velvets' legendary range). And yeah, I'm one of those people who don't even count Squeeze as a Velvets album, so I didn't bother listening to it this time. With all that said, some of the stuff on Another View and especially VU sounds significantly better than what ended up on their latter two records. "Stephanie Says" is probably as catchy as a song with the word "Alaska" in it can be, and I dare you to have more fun in two minutes than in listening to "Temptation Inside Your Heart".

Once that was eventually completed I listened to You're a Woman, I'm a Machine, Death From Above 1979's 2004 release on Vice Records that ended up being their only full-length record before their rather inevitable implosion. This was a record I was listening to for the first time pretty much after being bugged about it nonstop from a few people whose musical opinions I trust; still, I went in fully expecting to hate it for a number of reasons, the silliest one being their well-publicized legal spat with the New York-based Death From Above record label who I'm pretty much genetically required to love that saw vocalist Sebastien Grainger declare James Murphy to be a "selfish piece of fuck" (???) and rather impolitely declare a jihad on him. No, seriously, that's what he said. But anyway, they were a two-person dancepunk act that basically signified everything both right and wrong with the 00s "post-punk revival". So like I said, I went in fully expecting to hate them, and I certainly did at first because the opening two tracks were godawful. But the record slowly started to improve with the surprisingly decent "Going Steady", got slightly better with "Go Home, Get Down", and then took a pretty drastic turn upwards with "Blood on Our Hands". The entire middle of the record is actually pretty goddamn great, starting with the aforementioned track and continuing through the amazingly catchy "Black History Month", the extremely fucking danceable "Little Girl", and "Cold War" where they finally manage to say something with their lyrics. It takes another bit of a turn downwards near the end, so I guess this record is a pretty mixed bag. Still, the middle third is worth listening to. And the bonus disc is actually better than 2/3s of the record itself, so that's always nice I guess. I had gotten pretty used to "bonus disc" being code for "shit shit shit" but there's some pretty fun remixes and a couple of B-sides that they probably should have just included on the fucking album. If you really don't give a fuck about substance whatsoever and just want something to dance to, there's far worse albums out there.

Finally I just finished listening to Vampire Weekend's self-titled debut. This is one of those records that sounds pretty much exactly like what you'd imagine it would sound like just from looking at the dudes who made it. It's also one of those records that, if you made the mistake of reading/listening to any of the hype before you start listening to it, you're gonna wonder what the fuck the big deal was. But it starts to grow on you after a while; it has that weird fucking indie trend of starting out with a couple of awful tracks, but around "A-Punk" it picks up a bit. "Campus" and "Bryn" are the highlights, showing these guys can write some fairly decent lyrics and certainly catchier beats than you'd expect from a record like this. Still, a fairly overrated record and not something I'd be rushing out to listen to if I were you. And here's a completely shallow criticism for you: would it have killed these fuckers to throw a "the" in front of their name? I keep finding myself typing out "The Vampire Weekend" instead of just "Vampire Weekend" without thinking about it, because it sounds a LOT less fucking stupid that way. Seriously, say "Vampire Weekend" aloud in any sort of sentence and it just sounds really awkward.

Soooo I suppose that's it for now. Next up on my list of shit to listen to: Gold by Gang of Four, Echoes by The Rapture which is one of those records I heard and liked seemingly a million years ago but I'm worried won't hold up, and the closet mix of The Velvet Underground. Perhaps if I'm once again bored at 1 in the morning I'll bore you all to death some more. Yay~